The following is a transcript from a conversation that took place at my house a few mornings ago:
"Dad, guess who I am!"
"Well sweetheart, I'd judge by the Snow White dress and Superman cape that you're wearing that you are some sort of royal superhero hybrid that I was previously unaware of."
"I'm Princess Supergirl."
"Oh, I see that now. How did I ever miss that? Well, Princess Supergirl needs to get ready for school."
"Princess Supergirl doesn't go to school."
"Oh no?"
"No, she stays home and fights crime."
Well I hate to disappoint Princess Supergirl, but there is not much crime around here. But there are a few lollipops missing from the jar of candy in the cupboard. Does Princess Supergirl know anything about what might have happened to them?"
"Uh, Princess Supergirl doesn't know anything about that."
"Could it have been your partner over there, Slobber Girl, who's sitting in her booster seat and nicely eating her breakfast?"
"It might have been her, it's hard to know."
"Well, let's go back to the subject of school. Does Princess Supergirl think it might be important to learn how to read? It's hard to fight crime when you can't read street signs or the instruction manual for the Super Jet."
"Princess Supergirl's dad could go with her to fight crime, and then he could also read to her at night when she was tired. He could be 'Dad-man'."
"Does Princess Supergirl know that Dad-man has a bad knee right now from when he fell out of the tree in the front yard when he was putting up Christmas lights?"
"That wasn't Dad-man's finest hour."
"No, no it wasn't."
"Well, maybe Mom-lady can drive Princess Supergirl around when she needs to fight crime."
"Well, Mom-lady also teaches Spanish. That could be useful when you go up against super villains from South America. Would Princess Supergirl prefer to fight crime in the Hyundai or the mini-van?"
"Would Princess Supergirl need to sit in her car seat, or could she sit in the front seat?"
"Princess Supergirl would still have to sit in her car seat."
"What if Princess Supergirl's cape gets caught in the sliding door?"
"That's a risk Princess Supergirl is going to have to take. Does she still want to fight crime?"
"Could Princess Supergirl still live at home?"
"Oh, I don't know about that. Superheroes usually fight crime from their secret hideouts."
"Could Princess Supergirl fight crime from her room?"
"She might need to take down that 'My Little Pony' poster that she has on her door."
"What if Princess Supergirl really likes that poster?"
"Well, I suppose it could stay, your secret identity could be as a little girl who lives with her parents."
"That's a great idea! Dad-man is pretty smart."
"He tries. Now I think Princess Supergirl should get her shoes on and get ready to go to school."
"Okay Dad-man."
"Does Princess Supergirl really want to wear her cowgirl boots to school with the rest of her costume? That seems to be sending a few mixed messages about her super identity."
"Princess Supergirl always wears her cowgirl boots to school."
"Is Princess Supergirl aware that she still has maple syrup on her face?"
"No she wasn't. Should she go wash her face?"
"Yes. Princess Supergirl should go wash her face."
End of transcript.
Readers note: Princess Supergirl is conveniently available for your crime fighting needs the hour between school and naptime and for one hour after supper.
